every time i visit NYC/Times Square i see many homeless people. some are sitting their holding their signs, some are just asleep in the street, and some actually have balls to come right up to you and ask you for a few bucks. I'm wondering what the etiquette is for dealing with the homeless in NYC. I have many times handed over a few bucks here and there, but i was told that it is NOT very New York to fork over the cash. This may seem like a weird topic... and many people have told me to just ignore the homeless when in the city. What do you do?

It's a great question and is best served by listening to your own inner moral code. With that said more often then not I just ignore the begging. Ode to my moral code. This is something I struggle with. Even the most obvious 'begging' cases, younger people, I wonder how and why this person is in this predicament. It's sad. I do give to the homeless. I tend to give more when their old or disabled or both. Elderly women really effect me. I can't help to think if that was my own mother. So, the etiquette is if your 'feeling it' give other wise just ignore and walk away. It's not easy.



Edited 5 time(s). Last edit at 08/31/2010 09:37AM by askanewyorker.

April 15, 2000 something. I had just dropped off my taxes on 34th and 8th 1130am. At 1am the adjoining diner table started talking to me. A couple in their late fifties told me they volunteered running the Midnight Run in NYC for the homeless. A large van would drive around and hand out food and clothing each night. Both were former professors and upon inquiry what I could do, advised me on the topic the following:

1. Always ask for a doggy bag when you eat out. Leave it in any street corner elevated on a postal box, trash box or on top of a sign or light. Homeless know it is left over food for them.
2. Never get involved in the work they do. It is permanently and emotionally damaging and they wish nobody else to do the volunteer work they do. Homeless often have mental problems and more than they want to remember dangerously turn on them in a second no matter how much and how often you have helped and met them.
3. Give money only to very old people over 50 and children when you feel obliged to give money.
4. Alternatively offer to take homeless to a fast food stand or restaurant to buy them food. I have done so successfully but other times homeless rejects it if they don't get what they want - that is cash.

This is New York
Good luck.
David

I don't feed people from the scraps on my plate. You can ask for a doggy bag before you eat, or at least put half your food on a clean plate before wrapping it up. And ask for plastic utensils and napkins, too. Maybe tuck a bottle of water in the bag too.

I also think it's rude to treat a homeless person as a child, ushering them to a food stand or in any way making a decision for them on how to spend their money. If you're going to give an adult money, have the courtesy to treat them as a real person with the ability to spend it on what they need, whether or not it meets with your approval.

Imagine, someone disturbing your holiday by asking for money so they won't starve to death?

I've very rarely experienced a homeless person in nyc actually coming up to me on the street asking for money...normally they stay where they are and don't approach you (except maybe on the subway when they come through). In any case, as others have said, do what you want, nothing more or less.
The other day I gave half of my giant Katz deli sandwhich, which was untouched, to a homeless person and they were happy. Like oracle, i don't think I'd want to give them something I already ate from.

True story, several months ago in the underbelly of 42ND street I passed a human being who was moaning, groaning on the ground, hurting. What really struck me was the dirt crusted on this mans arms,legs and face. I was shocked by the dire situation. I gave him some money. I left and took care of whatever I was doing and came back 1hr latter to find the man standing around the corner from where I found him now reapplying mud from a container onto his face and arms. Reapplying!! I approached him and said, 'Academy award performance' he shrugged and and said, 'whatever'

I have been approached by homeless people in NYC (er well appeared to be homeless) that asked me if I had a few bucks. I gave it too them. I guess I just figure if you have the guts to actually ask/beg someone for a few bucks, you truly need it more than I do.
I have always thought bout buying an extra meal when purchasing one for myself to hand to a homeless person, but never know how to actually approach someone with it.. is this putting a doggie bag on an elevated mailbox/sign/light a real thing that is done in NYC? I have never heard of that. hmmm.
So the jist I am getting is that it is ok, and not ok to hand out money to the homeless. I guess I will continue to just go with what I "feel" like doin in that moment when I encounter a homeless person in the city. I wish I could help out all of them, but than I would become homeless if I did that. and so it seems, that the person who told me that giving money to the homeless is not something a new yorker would do... well it's not a true statement. :/