Manhattan or Brooklyn? Do the other boroughs even count? As I type NPR is negotiating a debate on this subject.

Well, as an Astoria resident, I'm deeply offended.

Sure, I'd live in Brooklyn Heights if I could afford it. But that's the whole point: affordability is a very key component of livability. And comfortable, friendly, convenient interesting parts of Brooklyn and Manhattan are no longer affordable.

On the other hand, here in Astoria I've got a spacious apartment in a safe, friendly neighborhood a few blocks from a convenient subway station, in a neighborhood vibrating and humming with the kind of multicultural energy I remember from my youth, an energy that's largely evaporated from Manhattan because of those insane prices.

I'm a little younger than Jonathan Lethem, but I still remember a Manhattan that wasn't whitewashed - that wasn't all rich, wealthy, well-fed white faces from Paris and Nebraska, where we had diversity and industry and dreams instead of those ugly luxury condos marching up Sixth Avenue in the 20s. That's what I find in Astoria, Sunnyside, Woodside, even Corona. I find, not crime, but people from around the world coming together as Americans, actually able to afford apartments or even (gasp) houses, realizing their dreams, melting their flavors into the pot.

If I had to choose between Manhattan and Brooklyn, I'd choose Brooklyn by far. I'd choose it for the brownstones in Brooklyn Heights and the hasids in Borough Park, for the Chinese along Avenue U and even the ghettos of Brownsville. I'd choose Brooklyn because there are still dreams being dreamed there, and because the houses are very, very pretty.

I wish I could choose Manhattan. I grew up there. But there's no middle class there any more.

But when I think of raising my children among the world that is New York, in a comfortable place around decent people not too far from Manhattan for a reasonable price, well, I've been more and more thinking Queens.

Red I'm a New Yorker before anything else, but I must say the dream is alive and better than ever here in Brooklyn.

I'm all for Brooklyn, too.
When I first came here to NYC, I intentionally chose to live in Brooklyn, and the decision had nothing to do with money. I just like it!

I'll take Manhattan! I've got very little living space, and I ran out of closet space about 10 years ago. While my neighborhood is not as ethnically diverse as some in the boroughs, it's easy enough for me to get anywhere quickly. And I like being able to walk everywhere, and I particularly like being a few blocks from Central Park.

Betty, if you don't mind me asking, how big is your apt.? How much do you pay for rent? I'm only 18 and in college but the goal is to move to the city and live and work. However i think i may need a reality check.

Red we have an apartment in one of those ugly luxury condos, it is off sixth in the 20s. For us it is great because my husband works in Newark and we wanted to live in Manhattan so it is easy for him to get to work from there. Also for me coming from another country and having to give up a very busy life here, (full time job, big house, 5 kids, 2 grandkids) I wanted to be convenient to most things in Manhattan. It doesn't mean I won't be visiting Brooklyn, Queens, etc though. I want to get to know all areas of New York. We were surprised how friendly people are and how quickly we met people in the building and from around the area. I wouldn't raise children in that area though, just not suitable. We raised ours in a small beachside suburb of Sydney with lots of sun and surf although not a lot of space because its highly populated and only 15 mins drive from the Sydney CBD. For this stage of our lives (late 40s) Manhattan is perfect.

Wow, this is a great debate.

Marea, part of the issue is that I grew up at 26th Street and 6th Avenue. I'm finding that as a young man starting a family, my ability to afford a place to live is much less than my parents' - and I make more money than my dad did at my age, I think. Because of those luxury condos - because so much of Manhattan has become luxury - I can't raise my children on the streets I was raised on, and that makes me very, very sad. At least I quite like Astoria. Many of the other people like me live here now.

Yeah, but I bet you've been in your apartment since before 1995 and it's either stabilized, controlled or owned, right, Betty? Jealousy, jealousy.

You have the same problem that our children are now facing in the area in which we live. The price of housing in Sydney and particularly in close proximity, as we are, to the city is through the roof. You have to pay at least $1.3 million for a modest 3 bedroom cottage in our area. Of course the fact that we live nearly right on a beach adds to the value. By the way we bought into the area 26 years ago that is the only reason we live where we do. Our children cannot afford to buy into this area and are struggling even to pay rents here. Three of them still live at home. My 2nd son and his family tried to live south of Sydney for a while but my daughter-in-law could not stand the 3hrs commuting each day especially with very young children. We are hoping to help them a buy a place at some point in the future.

Guess where our ugly luxury condo is, 6th and 26th.

I finally had time to read this lovely debate (I take snatches of time at work to get on this site, shhhh).

Red and Marea, I know where you are both coming from. We bought our home in Denver 13 yrs ago for $100,000, just a little less than $30/per sq.ft., we can now get $300 per sq.ft.. This house is actually to big for our active family. No time to clean out the 13 closets. We are never home, we are to busy. I would love to downsize, but cannot afford to move into a smaller house in my own neighborhood!

My kids will never be able to afford to live where they grew up. The 730 sq.ft house we moved out of to this one (2,700 appx.) was just bought for $235,000, and scraped off to become a 3,000 sq ft'r for $800,000.

The kids (14 & 16) keep saying we can never sell, because they are going to both live in it. They actually get along well enought to do it I think.

Marea, I am already resigned to the fact that my kids (and maybe a friend or two of theirs!) will be living with us for many years. It is the new way of American life. 1. Kids out of college, high school, or tech school, cannot find a job, and 2. they cannot find a place they can afford to live in.

Most of my friends and family with kids in their early 20's are still one family in the same house. With maybe even the addition of a girlfriend/boyfriend, a child's spouse, and a grandchild or all of the above.

I have not been to Brooklyn yet, but I think I'll take Manhatten. I could learn to live with less stuff in a smaller place for lots of chutzpah. From experience, bigger is not better. I grew up in Oakland and San Francisco. Give me diversity anytime. We live in a white bread neighborhood (I am one of the few brown breads), but thank God my kids go to a very diverse school. 60 languages and 40 countries represented. We are the ELA school for the district (English as a second language). I am 5 blocks from Washington Park, what we would call our Central Park. Our high school is 125 years old and is across the street from the park. That tells you a bit of what we have here.

It used to be the "big" cities with this problem. Now it's all towns and cities. Red, as long as you are active in your children's lives, they will be happy and well rounded no matter where you live. I know you are not to the kiddo point of life yet. Get your strength ready. It is a lot of work, and worth it. I pray every day for the single parents of the world who work full time. I don't know how they do it. I am blessed with the most patient and loving father to my kids. Our oldest is dyslexic, and so many tears cried around the dining room table working on homework (from all of us!). We do not take our family unit for granted, and as I said pray for those who need support. Help a single parent with the gift of time if you know one.

Okay, I am writing from home to night, and I can blab, blab, blab. Red, I wish you and your beloved the best in your new life to come.

I visit this site while at work too Rita. Too busy and too tired when I get home. I know what you mean about kids living at home for longer these days. It has become pretty standard around where we live. We also have two of my 3rd son's friends live with us. They are both working 2 jobs and saving to travel overseas next year and the rent they were paying for an apartment nearby was making it very difficult. Our 2 sons who live at home have good jobs and the 21 year old is studying at university as well and it will be years before they can afford to move out. They will be staying in the house with their sister and possibly a couple more friends while we live in New York.

How far ahead in time is Denver than New York? We are 14 hours ahead.